Hearing from ex-gamblers is one way to encourage those trying to quit, says social services centre

SINGAPORE: It began with a S$50 (US$37) bet when he was 15 years old.
It then took another two years for Andreas Sow to begin gambling through illegal avenues. The bets grew bigger and bigger as he got deeper into the habit.
Over the course of 15 years, he racked up over S$500,000 in losses.
Mr Sow’s problem got so bad that his entire social circle shunned him. His mother threatened to disown him, and his parents asked his then-girlfriend if she still wanted to tie the knot with him.
“I really tried to quit by my own means. I tried to cut up my ATM card … I just kept on relapsing and relapsing and relapsing. Life had no meaning because I was always broke,” he told CNA.
It was in a support group hosted by Blessed Grace Social Services that Mr Sow found acceptance and encouragement.
While he relapsed twice in his first year there, the 35-year-old now has better control over his vice after five years of having a support system and undergoing counselling.
Life has also taken on new meaning – he is now a father-of-two with another child on the way.
Mr Sow is far from alone.
While the overall gambling rate among Singapore residents aged 18 and above is on a downward trend, illegal online gambling is on the rise, according to the latest survey conducted by the National Council on Problem Gambling.
Illegal online gambling increased by 0.7 percentage points to 1 per cent in the survey released on Thursday (Nov 28), which aligns with rising global trends, said the council.
Of the over 3,000 residents polled, 40 per cent participated in gambling – the lowest rate in 18 years. 4D and TOTO continued to be the most popular types of gambling activities.
According to Blessed Grace Social Services, hearing from ex-gamblers is one way to encourage those trying to kick the addiction.
The non-profit said 50 per cent of its original group have stayed on to spur others to turn their lives around.
Apart from support groups, the organisation also provides counselling and helps to negotiate repayment plans.
It was founded in 2014 by Pastor Billy Lee, who had gamblers going to his church in “desperate situations” and financial ruin.
“When they first come … they know that they have a problem, but they can’t get out of their addiction on their own,” he pointed out.
“They have tried many times to stop gambling, but they can’t because now they have really fallen into this addiction where the neurotransmitters in their brains have really been rewired, and they have become compulsive gamblers.”
Dr Melvyn Zhang, senior consultant at the Institute of Mental Health’s (IMH) National Addictions Management Service, said that a gambling addiction is similar to being hooked on alcohol or drugs.
As for risk factors or signs to look out for, Dr Zhang said men tend to develop a gambling addiction much earlier in their lives compared with females.
Those with a family history of addictive disorders, those with mental health conditions, or those with an impulsive nature may also be more predisposed towards gambling, he told CNA’s Singapore Tonight programme.
“We also know that gambling disorders might give rise to other mental health conditions. We have seen individuals … develop a depressive disorder because they are very troubled by the consequences of their gambling behaviour,” he added.
“Some of them might also be at risk of suicide because … they are so troubled by the stress.”
To help their clients, counsellors at Blessed Grace map out the road ahead for them. It will take at least two years for gamblers to say they are properly on the path to recovery, while the next milestone will be five years.
“Normally, we tell them that it will take a lifetime for them to see if they have fully recovered, because a gambling addict can relapse anytime when they are triggered,” added Mr Lee.
“So the motto at our centre is: You come to heal, but you stay to help.”
That was the case for Mr William Lee, who began placing football bets out of boredom in 2010. To sustain the habit, he borrowed cash from friends, family and loansharks.
When he was hit with a mountain of debt, he fled his hometown in Malaysia to work in Singapore. But he lost his job after he began gambling again and resorted to taking money from his company.
He decided to seek help at Blessed Grace last year, where he started attending activities and counseling.
“I can sleep peacefully at night and now my life is really happy,” he added.
While Mr Lee said he has stopped gambling for a long time, he stopped short of saying he has fully kicked the habit, adding that he has to continue being at Blessed Grace to remind himself not to relapse.
He now helps newcomers at the centre, sharing his life story to help them overcome their addiction as well.
“I feel when I’m giving my testimony to others, to the newcomers … I give them hope, to let them be different,” he said.
“They also can do it; they can also change their lives.”